Blooming Muddy Foolhardy-ness

AKA British Military Fitness. I feel the need to catharticise (no I don't think that's a word either, but it works for me) about this. I have just returned from the Common covered in mud, Alice Cooper style mascara, soaking wet with a bleeding nose. And I paid for this. It is what I do twice a week in an attempt to shed the weight of 2 pregnancies within 18 months of each other. I have run about 5 miles, done about 50 press ups, god knows how many squat jumps, sit ups and other horrors, and even been dragged 100 metres by two other freaks like me. For some reason I enjoy this at the time. Only now as I sit shivering on the sofa with a warming glass of red wine (it's all credit and debit this exercise lark isn't it) and a slow cooked lamb shank on the way that I realise what a weird thing this is. Having children made many things in my body looser including the screws in my brain apparantly. HOWEVER I must say it does work. I have lost some weight and feel fitter than I ever have I think. I also like the fact that it gives me marginally more energy to keep up with the toddler.

Right that little rant over with I am pleased to say that the 'special blanket' was successfully subbed for Piggy tonight. Long may that last.

We had a lovely lunch with my dad today. He is about 70 ish (but looks not a day over 55) and cycles about 100 miles a week easily. He's very fit and active so is rather fed up at the moment as he came off his bike on the black ice on Monday. For someone who is very fit and active this must be very hard. For someone like me this would be a great excuse to put my feet up and watch re-runs of Poirot all day. Anyway he loves his bikes, has loads of them and so I am wishing him a very swift recovery. Not least because me and the girls enjoy his weekly visits on a Friday, we normally share a few glasses of red (Dad & I not the girls clearly unless I want them to sleep), cheese on toast and put the world to rights, in between feeding babies, chasing toddlers and generally having broken conversations. He's a great pal to me and has made a real effort to be a constant and present part of mine and my family's life. In fact when we move house I'll rope him in to help out the man van getting all our stuff from London to Surrey. But one of these days I'll get back on my bike and cycle through the countryside with him again, it's got to beat doing sit ups in the dark on a swampy common.

No.1 daughter sat at the table with us and was very well behaved until someone said she was very well behaved at which point she threw her fork on the floor, decided she wanted to sit on Mummy's lap, chucked a potato in her water and generally went back to being the little minx we love. I was a bit bemused by the perfect Victorian child I had for about 10 minutes and was relieved to have my daughter back. The baby meanwhile had a sleep, then gurgled and glugged her milk sweetly and charmed us all as usual.

So New Year's Eve tomorrow; not at all sure I'll stay up till midnight, but may well be up cuddling one or other child at that time instead. After the appearance of the first tooth and 2 nights sleeping through, I am under no illusion that it will continue. Sleep depravation is a real killer actually. I found the first months of both children's lives very very hard and decided that if I ever end up on "I'm a nobody get me out of the jungle factor " I'll take sleep as my luxury item.

I am delighted that 17 people think this blog is worth following and would like to say a massive THANKYOU. I really and truely appreciate it.

Happy New Year!
xx

The problem with Piggy

Most children suck a thumb or have a favourite toy or blanket to help them sleep, so I'm told. Inexplicably no.1 daughter has a china piggy bank. I can't quite recall how this started, but one night she just asked for Piggy who up until that point had been minding his own business on her chest of drawers. At first it was quite sweet and funny. We would smile at each other downstairs when we heard it being rolled over at night, the gentle chink of coins or the thud as it landed on the floor.

Now though, I'm trying to 'wean' her off him. Let's face it it's not that safe is it. I mean aside from the worrying capitalist tendancies it suggests, it's a pretty big breakable object. I have tried replacing Piggy with a lovely blanket my sister gave her for Christmas, but it didn't cut it. But shortly I will sneak in and Piggy will go to the great farm in the sky. It's the only way.

We think it's all over...

God Christmas doesn't half go on does it? The actual day was fairly relaxed, well as it ever is with a toddler and a baby, but it was just the 4 of us. I was the perfect Christmassy housewife/mother (there's a first for everything); slow cooked the coq au vin for about 14 hours - our oven is broken of course (it's a law of science that the oven/heating/dishwasher will break down over Christmas), I'd wrapped the presents, delegated the tree buying/decorating to him indoors (he wasn't quite sure how the ribbon was used so it looked a bit like an accident in a haberdashers but the thought was there). So all was good. Naturally no.1 daughter wanted fish fingers for lunch and I lost my domestic goddess credentials after burning not 2 but 4, then finally gave up and scraped the burnt bits off. She ended up joining us in a bit of Coq and then fell asleep for most of the afternoon. Result! She was delightful as was the baby and him indoors. We had a lovely lovely day.

So Boxing day we're down at my sister's pub, which is lovely (The Bull at Benenden in Kent if you fancy it - great carvery on a Sunday cooked by my brother in law's own fair hand). I have about one million nieces and nephews who are all under the age of 12 so it was lively to say the least. My toddler loved it, everyone was getting merry and we couldn't beat 'em so joined 'em in several beverages and the day was a wonderful success. Well done big sis!

Charades into the night (well about 10 pm but that's pretty late for old Larry Lightweight here), then joined no.1 daughter in bed for most of the night as she got a bit scared in her cousin's 'big' bed (not quite big enough for Mummy though, hence the crunched shoulders and best Quasimodo impression). All in all a lovely time was had by all.

Back in town and my best friend who I see far too rarely came to stay, on a whistle stop trip from his new home in Singapore. He's godfather to the toddler and the perfect example of godly leadership and is sure to teach her the ways of the lord. He's also a gay atheist. Well he's bursting with love for her and I adore him so therefore he was a great choice frankly. We watched Bruno - holy cow! Bit too much for my sensibilities.

'I do it Self!' is the latest statement from no.1 daughter. This goes for walking down the stairs (great), using a fork (excellent), cutting up raw chicken (ok I stopped there). She is fiercely independent, yet incredibly clingy at the same time. Amazing. She wants Mummy all the time (and Daddy today actually), but wants to do everything herself. It's extraordinary how a 2 year old can manage this feat in conflicting desires. But she does it pretty well. She makes me laugh every hour of every day. She has better comic timing than any overpaid BBC 1 'comedian'. The baby meanwhile has sprung her first tooth. Hurrah! Does this mean the first full night's sleep in oh about 3 months? I bloody hope so. I got terribly excited when I saw it in Sainsbury's today as I was pushing her about in her carseat in the trolley. I exclaimed as much rather loudly since him indoors was pushing the toddler around in her own trolley. What a lovely family day out to Sainsbury's. Clearly it must be Christmas. Next week we'll be back to me doing it with children, balancing the basket on top of the Phil & Ted's whilst dodging the biscuit aisle.

So only New Year's eve to get through till normal life resumes, well sort of, we then have 'The Move' to tackle. Maybe then I can give my liver a rest - I am optimistically and somewhat misguidedly hoping to give up the booze for January. Whether I achieve it or not remains to be seen (unlikely but I can try). Also quite tricky since him indoors seems to be permanently stocking up the cupboard with gorgeous wines 'because it's Christmas'. Oh well, as I said before if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!

Raisins, sultanas or rabbit droppings anyone?

It's like a plague of bunnies has rampaged through the house for their own festivities. Everywhere I look there are goddamn raisins. On the floor, on the bottom of my slippers, squidged between the back of the sofa, on the walls, in my bed?! My daughter is the great raisin monster.

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I am a mum of two, I have a grown up job, I run Mabel & Milo and I like to occasionally watch Eastenders and sometimes even talk to my husband.  As a consequence of that I don't have a huge amount of time, blogwise, for anything other than posts that I want to write about things I want to share.  So please do send me any requests but please don't be offended if I don't reply.

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Motherless daughters make over the top mothers... discuss.

Christmas is an emotional time for everyone isn't it? Arguments with the family, forgetting to defrost the turkey, over excited children who don't want to sleep. But for me it's also a time when I feel the loss of my Mum even more than normal. Having kids has made me miss her almost constantly (if only I could ask her what I was like as a baby/toddler, how did she deal with my tantrums?) but Christmas is all about family isn't it (in an Eastenders sort of way). And since the girls something wonderful's happened. I actually look forward to Christmas, I am getting excited about seeing them excited (well within reason, they are only 2 and 7 months, so they're not quite leaving a mince pie for Santa yet). But I also find myself getting stockings over the fireplace, milk ready for the reindeer, oh and too many presents. Maybe it's the lack of a mum in my life that makes me want to be the perfect Christmassy mum for my girls, or maybe it's just because it's the best excuse to actually enjoy this time of year - something I haven't really done for the best part of 20 years. Whatever the reason, I'm a bit over the top at Christmas these days and hopefully my Mum's toasting my little family with a glass of sherry as I type!

By the way I'd like to say here too that I'm rather smug to have a lovely mother in law. She adores the girls and always makes me feel totally welcome and doesn't interfere with my parenting. God bless her.

Right enough Christmassy nonsense. The nanny's here and I'm not going to work so I'm going to huddle down under the duvet in guilt-free bliss for an hour! Hurrah!!

Merry Christmas xx

Liz Fraser's new book..

follow her new character on Twitter it's @findingimogenB not as I previously typed. Sorry Liz!
Right really have to go now, have MAJOR neglecting child guilt!!

Joe McElderry I ain't...

So the Christmas party. I opted for the M&S number (sorry Geriatric Mummy but frankly it was a kindness to others, even with the super hold you in knickers the prebaby dress would have scared the children). I felt it my duty to kick off the karoaoke proceedings and thereby give the rest of the troops the nod to get going themselves. I quickly worked out that I am one of those people who thinks they are rather good, but are actually rather dreadful. After dragging my friend Jo up to sing 'Stop' by the Spice Girls I was pretty much ordered to give the others a go. Thank god I'd adhered to my own rule of taking the next day off, actually the whole next week in this case.

No. 1 daughter currently desparate to close this laptop, she has finally stopped trying to press every button (after the naughty step...) but am going to have to blog off for now and give them some 'quality time'.

More later x

No. 1 daughter with mummys new bribe. A croissant! 'Really yummy mummy'

Holly Ward

About Me

I'm a working mum with two beautiful girls; the toddler and the baby, I'm married to him indoors (or Mr Mummy's Life). I work pretty much full time and actually love it most of the time. Life can get on top of me from time to time, but I find this blog a rather cathartic way of keeping my perspective on it all. If I waffle, just switch me off.

I am proud of what I write here, I am honest and real and never talk about my company or slate anyone (apart from celebrities occasionally, but that's okay isn't it?). So here's a little statement that anyone who knows me from work should please read:


At work I am grown up who is reasonably good at her job, I am in control and I can solve problems. I enjoy it, it keeps me sane and makes me who I am.

At home I am a Mummy. I am totally not in control and I find it hard to work out how to hold a toddler, open the fridge and pour milk at the same time. I cannot solve the most basic problems. I watch too much CBeebies (although C5's Milkshake is fast taking over - we LOVE Bottle Top Bill). Frequently things happen to me and my family that I want to share, just for the hell it and also to keep a record. So that's why I started this blog. Most importantly I love doing it. I love the comments I get, I love the fact I have finally found somewhere I can indulge my love of writing. (a lot of love going on here as you can tell).

So if you think it's funny that your boss is blogging, don't. I am a Mum and a normal woman too. I have a life outside of work. So by all means follow me (please do) but don't judge me for what I write here and let me continue to feel free enough to write the way I want.

"Getty luuuunch!"

So lucky for me Friday is my 'day off' (from the office job that is). And 'Getty Lunch'is the squeal every Friday morning, as we head off to Fruity Tunes. It's the bribe to get no.1 daughter dressed, breakfasted and shoed to get to our weekly outing of singing and dancing. But today it all changed. There was a special Christmas picnic! Excellent. But of course no.1 is old enough now to know when she's being conned and a ham and coleslaw sandwich wasn't gonna cut it when she was used to spaghetti, ice cream and a babychino (yes i'm not sure either).

Terrible Mummy driving her home afterwards to ever decreasing sobs of 'getty lunch mummy', the fact she'd stuffed at least the contents of about 5 sandwiches and more Pringles than I was happy with (why oh why at a toddler's picnic)was irrelevant to her. She had been done out of her special treat. And lets be honest, I rather like it too, it's a great chance to catch up with friends (in between shovelling mouthfuls into the baby and stopping the toddler collecting the cutlery from every single table).

Still we saw our friend Justine and her 2 beautiful children (one of whom is Mr Fruity's no.1 fan!) they danced and ran around and had fun, and as we all know, if they're happy we're happy.

An odd thing has happened now. They are both having a nap AT THE SAME TIME. This run of luck (they both slept through again) will not last to Christmas clearly, but it's fun now. Naturally I'll blog off in a minute for a sneaky kip, have to build up energy for the Office Party....

Which brings me on to the next dilemma and one I'm concerned I still have aged 36. Do I wear the staple M&S favourite that covers all the muffin top but is a bit middle aged if I'm honest, or go for the pre baby dress and kid myself I've lost more weight than I probably have but at least I might feel a bit younger. I guess it's a no brainer. The M&S one wins every time.

I've been blogging 4 days now and am still enjoying it which for me is quite considerable. I have a very short attention span for new fangled things. But as a journalist in the Evening Standard wrote the other day 'bloggers are just failed writers'. Cheers for that Mr. Happy.

All for now xx

Arabella Barron's paintings.

This a small selection of her beautiful pictures.  If you'd like to contact her about a commission please email her at abzwill@aol.com.

Beach

Blue Flowers

Pink flowers

Blue flowers

Lovely lovely Claireabella

I just love this email from my friend Claire, who's a gardener:

i love this stalking thing- can you do stalking as a career?
not only am i a dumb gardener but all fashion sense has totally left me due to the cold. today i is mainly wearing tights, leggings and jeans. 4 jumpers and a frankly disguting 'gillet' with matching fagan style fingerless gloves. i would however like to point out(incase lucy reads this) that i have not yet commited the ultimate in fashion crime and i'm not wearing a fleece! if you ever meet anyone from dragons den i would like to invent a bra with removable padding that you can warm in the microwave

Its all gone a bit student

Oh good lord alive I am achey all over after sleeping on the landing outside the bathroom with a manky old blanket keeping me warm on the coldest night of the year so far. Why I hear you ask (I like to think someone might be reading), because my husband (hitherto 'Him Indoors') got back at 3.30am crashed around a bit then fell into bed, after regaling me of his 'weird' Christmas do, and proceeded to snore REALLY LOUDLY. Even though he was on his front. Isn't that a scientific impossibility? There seemed little point making the journey downstairs to the freezing living room when I knew both kids would start their daily 'who can wake mummy first' competition at about 5am. Well there is a God because this was the first day in oh about 2 years that they BOTH SLEPT THROUGH till about 6.30. Hurrah! A jubilant me jumped up off the floor, groaned as my back cracked and skipped into no.1 daughter's room. As ever it all kicked off when I had the temerity to get no.2 daughter up and nappy changed which meant I had to put the 2 stone toddler down, a mercy to my back but not my ears. But alas not even their collective gurgles, screams, crying and stamping of feet could rouse the beast. He was comatosed. It's my turn on Saturday as our office do is on Friday, if only I was better at sleeping through their noises - I always always wake up, must be motherly instincts.

So we are not off to Manchester as there's snow. And we all know that snow means normal life ceases and all travel plans must be changed. Because Virgin can make trains that can go almost upside down on the tracks but they can't deal with snow. Also our French colleague can't get a plane. So fair enough. I think lunch is in order.

I gave up my seat on the tube for a lovely pregnant lady this morning. This is especially kind of me since I was trying to put on my mascara at the time. Bad idea.

I'm really quite taken with this blogging thing. Such fun, don't know why I didn't try it years ago.

By the way I had a brief 'chat' with Liz Fraser yesterday, lovely author of 'Yummy Mummy' books that helped me survive the birth and first few months of no.1 Daughter's life. She is writing a novel and you can follow her character Imogen Brown on Twitter @imogenB.

All the best x

It's snowing (no really it is but this is a rubbish picture)

"Is it a boy or girl?"

Said the man from Clockwork removals who came to quote for moving us. Were the pink pyjamas and Peppa Pig slippers not enough of clue? Was the bobbed blond hair not a bit of a giveaway? When I showed my obvious umbrage he said 'well it's difficult to tell these days'. These days? Have children morphed into androgynous beings over the last 20 years... Despite that he was quite friendly and we'll probably use them for our move. Mainly because I can't face the prospect of packing up our lives with a toddler trying to unpack it all and a baby getting accidentally bubble wrapped in with the Royal Doulton.

So at work today I have just given everything gift vouchers for Christmas. A reasonable show of gratitude, but frankly it's the least we can do. I am one step closer to finding a super duper digital person thanks to my friend Emma and 2 days closer to checking out for Christmas. Hurrah!

My nanny said this morning that one of previous employers would give her a list of things their children could now do after spending 2 weeks with them on holiday. The sad thing was the Nanny knew all this because the kids had been doing them for ages. I don't want to be that mum. That's why I try to make it home every night for bath and bed time and actually it's not quite so bad when they wake at night. At least I get to have a cuddle.

Off to Manchester tomorrow for a second stage pitch, work Christmas party on Friday at the Groucho which I will be leaving at a sensible time as we are then off to Birmingham the following day for the weekend. Eliza is looking forward to sleeping in her Night Garden bed. I am praying she will sleep in her Night Garden bed.

All for now xx

 

Why am I doing this?

So this is my first stab at a blog. Why? What on earth would anyone want to know about me for that's always assuming anyone bothers to read this. Well it's not about that for me. It's all about my girls. They are teeny tiny at the moment (2 and 6 months) but one day they'll be bigger and they'll be able to read and they may want to know what their mummy does or did with her life and maybe what I thought and felt about things, specially them. Also I used to write a diary but frankly putting pen to paper is just too time consuming, I can type quicker so this seems like a good idea. Now let's be clear I know NOTHING about this sort of thing. All this terminolgy is new to me and I'll probably make some right clangers. But as I say it's not about what anyone else thinks, it's just a train of thought for me and my girls. But as I am a mum and a working one at that (I'm actually a rather grown up MD) I do have some strong views on things that affect other people like me and their little treasures. So I will probably add the odd review.

So anyway what's happened on my first day as a blogger? Eliza (my eldest, who's 26 months) woke up in a very bad mood mainly because her 'piggy' (no not a soft cuddly toy but an actual china piggy bank - yes clearly a bad mother for letting her sleep with something that could potentially knock her out in her sleep) fell out of bed. She calmed down when I put Tweenies on. Tilly her little sister (7 months) came down with Daddy. Then the morning went a bit awry. Nanny texted, was going to be late, Eliza kicked off because her toast was in the wrong bowl, I was trying to get dressed but couldn't find a clean top, whilst me and my other half were trying to discuss our forthcoming house move. Fun.

At work, meeting to 'workshop' a pre-biotic product. Talked about Mommy Bloggers. Then I spent the rest of that meeting thinking up the name for my blog. Bought a gorgeous pair of boots on way back to the office. Now have to sign off and get ready for a conference call with our network agencies to talk about a sex-aid we are pitching for.

All in a day's work xx