Where am I?

I have watched innumerable films where the heroine is knocked out and wakes up in some strange room saying "Where am I?".  It just all looks a bit staged and, well, unbelievable really.  But yesterday I realised that there's a very good reason for saying that.  Because when you collapse somewhere, you come to and have no idea where the hell you are.

I went to the doctor yesterday for a *ahem* women's thing.  It was over pretty quickly, uncomfortable but frankly having given birth naturally twice I really don't complain much about anything 'down there' any more.

So I left the doctor's room, bright eyed, bushy tailed, if a little hot (blimey it was boiling yesterday wasn't it?) and trotted up to the receptionist to book my follow up appointment.  As I was standing there trying to figure out the calendar on my phone, I started to feel nauseous and dizzy.  I could feel the room closing in on me and I was just thinking that I ought to say something to the receptionist, as I couldn't really focus on the calendar on my phone, when I found myself sat in the corner of the entrance hall, with a pain in the back of my head and a rather painful arm.  Legs akimbo and skirt round my knickers.  Such grace. But the bizarre thing was the overwhelming sense of 'where the bloody hell am I?" I honestly had no idea where on earth I was, last thing I knew I was at work.

I'm reading a book at the moment called Sellevision by Augusten Burroughs (just finished actually) it's about a fictional home shopping channel.  When I came to on the floor on the doctor's waiting room I actually thought that I was in the book.  Not actually physically in the book, that would be too surreal, but in the studio of the home shopping channel in the book.

To top it all I had managed to set the alarm off because I had landed slam against the door.  So I had literally fallen backwards, whacked my head on the brick wall, my arm had hit the radiator and I had jammed the door shut, setting off the alarm.  The alarm is connected to the local police station, who then automatically called the doctor (as per procedure), causing her to come running out of her surgery to find me, the patient she'd just seen, looking bewildered on the floor.  But because i was jammed against the door no one could actually get to me.  I felt so sick that I just lay down and they literally had to shove my legs out of the way. I could hear the receptionists gossiping "she gave her head a good old whack on that brick wall, you'd better not move her doctor!"  I sense I provided a good bit of drama for a village surgery.

They took very good care of me whilst I was there.  Checking my blood pressure (that had gone through the floor) and generally being nice to me.  I called him indoors to come and get me and burst into tears when he arrived.

Combination of the medical procedure, the heat and most probably the general exhaustion of a million and one broken nights.