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I have mixed feelings about bath time (my kids bath time clearly, not my own, I’m not sure I’ve ever given that much thought). It’s as entertaining as is it frustrating and if all my threats were real then the bath would actually be in the dining room by now, given the amount of water that finds it way onto the floor every evening.  Tilly’s the worst.  She’ll smile wickedly, look at me and pour an old shampoo bottle of water over the side.  Then Eliza will say:

“Tilly, how DARE you!  That’s very naughty. We’ll all have to live in the Wendy House if the ceiling breaks”.  As threats go it’s pretty creative don’t you think? But Tilly will look at her and giggle, at and then so will Eliza and I’ll be left standing there thinking, is there really any value in saying anything at this point?

So this evening Tilly appeared to be collecting a variety of receptacles in which to load water for the daily ‘chuck water over the bath game’.  Her preparation was admirable.

“Er Tilly, what have you got there?”

“My wash bag Mummy.”

“I know, what do you have in it?”

“Just a few things, I’ve got a lid and a cup and a boaty thing.  Just some things.”  Said complete with palms and eyebrows turned up, she couldn’t have looked more guilty if she’d been holding a water  pistol (except I banned those about 2 years ago, mean mother).

“Right. And what are you going to do with them?”

“I’m just going to sell them Mummy, I’m just going to sell them at the river bank.” I think this is connected an old joke she likes (where do fish keep their money? in a river bank – cue much hilarity).

“I see.  Well you can sell them in a the river bank but perhaps you can leave the bag behind as it’ll get wet in the er.. river. Clearly.”

She thought about this for a very long time, long enough for Eliza to get undressed and climb in first which rarely happens.

“I love you Mummy but I’m not giving you the wash bag.”

“Ok, well in that case you can leave it here.”

“Mummy I’m going to go and sell my things, then I’ll leave the bag otherwise I’ll have no where to put my things.”



She trotted off and had a full conversation, both sides of the dialogue were covered in a complex discussion about selling a boaty thing and a plastic cup.

She then returned the the ‘river bank’ jumped in and started chucking water out of the bath.

Ah well, soon be Christmas.


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