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A Very Serious Issue

I’m running the gauntlet with this one. Chances are reasonably high that this might get me into trouble but I have blog tourettes and can’t stop myself. You see I’m faced with a bit of a problem, actually it’s a bit more than that, it’s morphing into an anxiety attack. I’m totally preoccupied with it. I can think of nothing else, it’s on my mind 24/7. I haven’t eaten in days. The children can’t get my attention. I have a very serious issue.

I’m going to a fancy dress party.

And breathe.

It will be okay.

But will it? Will I get the costume right? Will anyone recognise who I’m meant to be? Will I bottle it and go as a big, hairy, anonymous gorilla instead? Maybe. But then big, hairy gorillas don’t really fit with the theme.

Him indoors realised the severity of this issue this evening as I came back from my run. I walked through the door and the first words out of my mouth were,

“How about Geri Halliwell in that union jack dress?”

“Er, yes. If you like.”

“But I’ve left it a bit late to find a red wig. Or a union jack dress. And that dress was really short. I think Geri was about 20 years younger than me when she wore it.”

“Yes possibly. Maybe not.”

“What do you mean maybe not? What are you saying? Are you saying I’m too old and fat to wear a dress like that?”

“What? No. Blimey.”

“Maybe I’ll stick with Mia Wallace (from Pulp Fiction), she’s iconic (that’s the theme), but will anyone know who I’m meant to be?”

“You could wear a picture of her.”

“That’s a ridiculous idea!”

“Sorry, just trying to help. Anyway I’m watching Masterchef, go and have a shower and your trainers smell so leave them outside.”


I am, of course, really looking forward to the party and once I have got my head around this little obstacle (which is pretty fundamental to the going to the party bit) I can relax. Him indoors is clearly an expert at this. He’s not bothered at all and seemingly has loads of ideas. This is odd. I have known him approximately 11 years and in that time he has never, that I know of, been to a fancy dress party.

So I’d be very grateful for any other ideas. Currently Mia Wallace is the hot favourite. I have rather fabulous red nails at the moment, I have a white shirt, black trousers and black pumps. I don’t smoke and I’m unlikely to have a drug overdose, but those are just minor details.

Thanks to Cinephilia

Thanks to Cinephilia

So ideas. Ok?

Go on.




  1. claire reid says:

    go as the queen- easy- pick up one of those card masks, get down the charity shop- or get Lucy to- get some tweed on and a head scarf with a crown on top to make double sure that people recognize you. or if all else fails take note from your daughter and just dress up as a princess- seems to work for her.!
    lorra love

  2. Go for it – just light up one of those electric cigarettes and pop on some vampire red lippie and you’ll be set! Sounds perfect. Have fun x

  3. Ha ha. Great post – love it! Visiting from #PoCoLo

    I love fancy dress. So much, in fact, that we had a fancy dress wedding. The theme was ‘Best of British/All Things Aussie’ (I’m Aussie and my hubby is British). You can read about it here:

    Love your blog! Keep it up! :-)

  4. I have a union jack dress you could borrow! :-) Or depending what is available in your wardrobe you could try Judy Garland as Dorothy (sparkly red shoes might be an issue at short notice, but you could accessorise with a small yappy type dog?); Margaret Thatcher (handbag); Joan of Arc (if your kids have plastic armour and a hobby horse) or perhaps Lady Gaga (though again, wigs are essential here). Hm. Not sure if any of these suggestions were truly helpful but I hope you find something good!

  5. I am the same, fancy dress is a no go for me, i hate it with a passion and i spend weeks obsessing about it then hate the whole night as i feel uncomfortable.

  6. God I hate themed parties what’s wrong with wearing your own clothes? I think your idea sounds fab and quite easy to achieve. Look forward to seeing some pics! #PoCoLo

  7. Here from #PoCoLo too… but absolutely no help whatsoever as I have no idea! I would also quake at th idea of fancy dress, unless it was Abba themed. That I can do – that’s what I did for my 40th :) I suspect any future dress up event will mean that outfit being wheeled out again, so I’m sorted. Sorry that doesn’t help you ;)

  8. Crikey, I am wracking my brains for you but just can’t think – although I think Mia Wallace is a great idea :) Is Him Indoors going? If so then you could go as the Blues Brothers! Anyway hopefully some #PoCoLo will help you – thanks for linking up xx

  9. Oh go as Mia, she is the queen of iconic coolness. Anyone who doesn’t recognise her doesn’t deserve to be partied with. Just think how many times you can put on your lowest husky voice and say….Vincent Vega! Can you tell I love Pulp Fiction haha

    • itsamummyslife says:

      I bottled it and went as Geri in the Union jack dress. But there were a couple of Mia’s there and a couple of amazingly good Vincents. I kicked myself!

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